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Low self esteem cannot survive if you follow a few simple steps. Believe me, because I have done it and you can too.
More self esteem means you can live with more happiness and meaning. You’ll begin to feel more confident as you become happier with who you are.
“I’m trying to break free from the miseries of low self esteem, and this web site is a huge confidence, and will serve as an aid in my quest to claim back what’s rightfully mine: my life.”– Amber
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Poor self esteem can be unlearned so take heart there is help!
Low Self Esteem – What to Do:
- Low self esteem feeds on negative thoughts so Don’t indulge in self criticism. Why are you waging war against yourself? There are many people who can bring you down if you listen to them. Why add to the negativity? Silence your inner judge.
- You can choose to please yourself It is good to care about other’s feelings but aren’t your needs just as important? Don’t neglect yourself! The most precious gift you have is your health. You need to look after yourself so that you will have the energy and strength to give your best to the world and to helping others. This will give you a sense of contribution in the world and will help you to value who you are.
- Don’t try to be like someone else. This leads to lack of self worth and confidence. You are unique and you cannot be someone else. Strive to improve but don’t criticise yourself for not being as successful, beautiful, slim or popular as others. It’s not easy to live according to your standards and values, but this is important if you are to respect yourself. Pretending is cheating yourself and the feelings that will result will be very negative.
- Take life and yourself less seriously. Failure just means you are not successful YET . Everybody fails before succeeding, don’t look on it as failure but as a means to learning. Perhaps you just need a change of direction. Problems make you stronger if you strive to overcome them. If you can laugh at your situation when you don’t quite get it right and realise that you just need to make some adjustments and try again then you will be so much less stressed and negative in life. Expect success but understand that it requires trial and error and hard work to make something truly worthwhile become reality. This will take the pressure of you as you will not be upset if instant success eludes you.
- Get my weekly roundup of tips that will boost your self esteem and get the first chapter of my book free. “Just finished the free chapter, feeling motivated! Like the questions asked, short and simple, yet they really make you think!”Karen Lewis
More Tips for Building Self Esteem
- First focus on finding the causes of your low self esteem.
- Self worth, confidence and assuredness increase when you Focus on your needs and desires. You deserve to live life as you want. Wanting self esteem is not selfish as long as what you want doesn’t hurt others or prevent them from living life on their terms. Remember that if you are happy you can be a better friend to others and when you are frustrated anger and resentment can build up quickly inside you. If you are, at least, striving for what you want and creating goals then you’ll feel much more positive that you are taking steps towards a better future.
- Forgiveness of yourself and others is something that will really help you so look into this.
- Focus on your successes. Lack of confidence feeds on your feelings of failure and inadequacy. Remember the truly successful things you have done in your life. Reward yourself when you do succeed.
- Use positive affirmations and quotes. Read them when you are feeling negative and need inspiration. A lift in your mood may be enough to motivate you to take action. Positive and inspirational words feed your mind and make you stronger and by using them often you can change your attitude to help you achieve what you want. This will also make you stronger, especially if you are self loathing.
- Use visualisation to help you achieve your dreams and increase your self esteem! Actually seeing yourself being successful and enjoying the results of the success you want is amazingly motivating and can help to make it a reality because you use all your inner emotions to become the person you want to be. Often the biggest obstacle between you where you are now and where you want to be is how you feel about yourself. If you cannot feel good about yourself, or picture yourself succeeding, or if you cannot imagine how it will feel to be doing whatever it is you want then you probably will never achieve it.
- Continuing on the same theme, if you really are unhappy with your appearance and cannot overcome the way you focus on this, cosmetic surgery can help you to feel better about yourself. Although it would not be my first recommendation there is a connection between self esteem and plastic surgery, read more here.
- Try this amazing hypnosis download – Building your self esteem now! Hypnosis is natural and tremendously successful because it uses the power of your mind in a positive way. It is quick and fun, try it.
- Focus on your strengths. Use them. You will succeed if you are true to yourself. No one can stop you if you use your talents and abilities positively but if you do not know what your strengths are, how can you improve your life?
- Work at achieving your goals. If you do this your confidence will increase and you will feel positive. The old saying, one step at a time is very important. Steady steps are possible if you make your goals reachable and break up your bigger goals into smaller steps. Reward yourself for each smaller victory and be certain that many small steps add up to an amazing journey.
- Your self criticism will die to nothing as you will know even if you do not succeed you tried all you could. Do your best at everything you try. On the other hand, give less than your best will take you nowhere and will bring you into the depths of low self esteem. If you need a greater challenge then go for it and again do your best. Look for a reason to do better in everything you do and stop the common practice that most people have today of moaning about their job or whatever it is they do. Look for the positive, it is always there too along with the negative but why focus on that and make yourself miserable?
- Feed your brain. Read inspiring books – they will really help you. Not just any books though, read the best. Check out my Top Recommended Books for Building Self esteem.
The above suggestions are steps you can take on the road to building your confidence and successful in your daily life. If you start on this road you need to keep at it. Others will sometimes knock you down so you need to be strong and listen to your heart.
Believing in yourself is all about focusing on your strengths. You must be honest with yourself and be true to your feelings. Don’t pretend to be anything that you’re not and don’t listen to others who try to convince you that you are wrong. Trust your intuition and your feelings to make the right decisions and decide today which direction you want to go.
I wish you success!
Website Author and Editor Bio
Karl Perera is a fully qualified Life Coach (DipLC), Teacher (MA) and author of Self Esteem Secrets. He has taught at various universities including Durham, Leicester and Anglia Ruskin, Cambridge. He has run More-SelfEsteem.com since 1997 and is an expert in Self Esteem and Self Confidence.