Since our childhood, our parents and those older than us teach us to love others and think of others before ourselves. But as we grow old, we must realize that loving ourselves is as important as loving others. If you don't have love and respect for yourself, you can never achieve your greatest potential. Respect for yourself stems from your self-esteem, which, in turn, is detrimental to your emotional, intellectual and social growth.

Lack of self-esteem gives birth to a number of problems. The biggest and most damaging problem is lack of confidence. If you don't have self-respect, you start believing that you're not capable of achieving anything. As a result, you feel unworthy of anything. Such thinking can not only destroy your career, but also damage your daily life.

In order to cure this problem, you must understand the reasons behind your low self-esteem. We all are born with the same mindset, so what causes some people to develop low self esteem? Well, one of the biggest factors responsible for this is the behavior of parents towards their child. If you are not taught to love and respect yourself, you will grow up to either be completely indifferent towards your self-respect or develop a very fragile ego.

Too much ambition can also cause low self-esteem. It is very important to have ambition and dreams in life, but excess of everything is bad. Over-ambition leads you to believe that you cannot fail. As a result, even a small failure may lead to low self-esteem as you won't be equipped to handle it.

To prevent low self esteem, you must understand that it is good to love yourself. You can truly love others, only if you have love for yourself in your heart. This is because; high self-esteem makes you feel good and happy about yourself and you can only make others happy, when you are happy.

There are various factors which make you feel bad about yourself and hence, lower your self-esteem. Age is one of those factors. Old age brings a number of problems with it, like bad health, lack of sources of income, loneliness etc. and all these contribute to low self-esteem.

Failing in relationships also hampers your self esteem. A sudden end in your relationship can leave you feeling rejected and lonely and your self esteem may suffer.

Whatever the cause of your low self-esteem, you must remember that there is always a positive side to every situation. Instead of feeling all the negative emotions, be positive and hopeful because no matter how grim the situation is; no situation is permanent and every problem has a solution.

Finally, always remember that God has given you this life to enjoy it to the fullest. Don't waste it by hating yourself and feeling negative about it.

I think when you feel you like what you are doing, where you are going and feel you have your priorities right. Feeling good means being satisfied with what you have, with what you are doing and where you are going. Next month we will look at how ambition can help or hinder you in your search for self esteem. Let's continue with this article's theme...

Don't make the common mistake of comparing your achievements to someone else or to what you believe you should have done up to this point. You will NEVER measure up and you will bring yourself down. LOW SELF ESTEEM. What you need to feel good inside is within your power. It is not the result but the route to achievement. You will have high self esteem when you have a sense of direction, satisfaction about your choices and actions and know that you are doing your best and doing something good.

- Do your best and you will respect yourself for it. If you don't you will know. You can cheat others but not yourself.

- Be honest and kind to others. Give yourself NO chance to be self critical.

- For most people doing good things brings satisfaction and a good feeling inside. If you have done something wrong and feel guilty about it your self esteem will suffer. Try to help others. Spend time with your kids, listen to others, call someone - be nice! Your self opinion will go up and you will feel self respect. The bonus is that others will be grateful to you and this will also boost your self esteem!

- Focus your thoughts on what is right in your life and on what you like. How can you make things better? Don't neglect ever what you want from life. Some sacrifice is necessary especially if you have family but you don't have to be a martyr. Self Esteem will only blossom when you decide to love yourself.

- One of the benefits of Self Esteem is confidence in yourself and knowing realistically where you are and where you are going. But careful - don't aim too high. Keep your sights on small improvements and planning to get where you want to be. Each time you have a small success you can feel happy and motivated to continue.

- Give and be generous! Give your time and of yourself. By doing this you will have no guilt when you want to spend time alone or on your own projects. if you organise yourself you CAN make time for yourself and others. You will feel more in balance and will feel you are living your life. Concentrate on these points and act on them. Next month I will focus on a different aspect of Self Esteem - being happy with what you have (how to manage ambition).